Writer Locked In Room With Security Guard
I got the following report and video from writer Gayne C. Young. It’s too dumb not to share.
SHOT SHOW Locked In
My SHOT Show fun took on a prison like quality early this morning when I found myself locked in my room at the wonderful Quad Hotel and Casino.
I didn’t have a problem getting through the door last night but this morning it was cemented shut. I tried and retried to open it then gave up and called down to the front desk. The receptionist that answered was just as baffled at my confinement as I was.
“I ain’t never heard dat’ problem before,” She admitted. “Wonder who I should call?”
She decided on security.
The security guard that came six minutes later made Barney Fife look like the very definition of a competent lawman as it took him all of two minutes to lock himself in the room with me.
It took him another two minutes to realize what he’d done.
“Oh shoot,” He exclaimed. “I locked us both in.”
Being the professional that he was however, Richard the security guard did everything in his power to get us out of the room. He called hotel maintenance, banged on the door at passing room service maids in the hall, and actually pondered my joking that we should jump out the window.
“How far down is it?”
I didn’t tell him.
Luckily the maintenance man that came was smarter than the hotel’s security detail as he didn’t lock himself in the room with us.
At least I don’t think he did.
I left as soon as he showed up.
I didn’t want to push my luck.
I hope you gave him a reach around….HOMOS!!
That’s pretty fucking funny.
Pepper tried the same thing once on me at ComicCon.
I won’t fall for that one twice.
Gayne,
I hope you got the guard to sign a waiver.
Observer makes all his babysitters sign one just in-case a strategically placed “nanny-cam” catches one of them on the toilet.
You can never be to careful
Abuelita always soaked her beans over night.
Just waiting to see what you guys do with that.
Minimosh,
How nice to see you.
I would never make a suggestive comment about your Abuelita.
What kind of guy do you think I am?
Mini,
Did she ever have any problems with shrinkage?
I hear a women’s beans get drier as she gets older.
My Nana used to keep moist by wearing a damp piece of paper towel in her panties.
True story.
mis mini kan i see you aftre yesterdays berdsnext is dried up adn next to a poopstak?
Good point, Mikey.
I’d like to know the answer to that myself.
Mr Young… Three things
Get rid of your beer belly
Did he tickle your balls with his mustache
Are you related to Jeff?
Beer belly! That hurts
I take it the answer is Yes to the other two?
Gayne….I have to say…..this was freakin’ HILARIOUS…..
Somebody call Obama….
I think we’ve found the next Director of Homeland Security
Pepper, how dare you insult our most kind and gracious host.
Gayne, If I may be so bold, I would counter with something like; You would notice that since you are eye level with my gut.
How can you miss his gut….it blocked some of the shots…
Gayne,
Don’t mind Pepper, the first thing he thinks of when he sees a strange man in his hotel room is giving him a reach-around.
Usually in these types of videos……the pizza boy is a bit younger….
Gayne…..as a journalist…..were you ever able to verify if the security guard had ever seen anything like this before…???
The world has devolved to a sorry state when an internet video about being locked in a hotel room DOESN’T involve three or four honeys in the shower soaping up each other tatas and vagas …….
I want to know how this all turned out.
Where is the video of the repair man “accidentally” catching Gayne coming out of the shower?
I’d like to know how Gayne’s boss took the news that he was late because he was sword-fighting in his room with two hotel employees.
Did he feel left out?
Maybe he was holding the camera, Mr Poop…..
This is a picture of how a scene from a “Hotel Video” should look……
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me63mvRjgk1qjoffao1_1280.jpg
They look pretty happy. That hotel must have a great 401K plan.
I think it turned out more like this
http://tinyurl.com/aq6fpr6
Rokan….. I like your hair colorist’s daring boldness….
Dr. Poop…..
….your observations, please…??
Tuco or Pepper…?
http://25.media.tumblr.com/4eb9772df29f671a631267350c20e204/tumblr_mgi6j45N9A1ra4pm3o1_500.jpg
I’m trying to place Gayne’s accent.
He’s either from Alabama, or Denmark.
. . . It could also be Cockney.
I think he’s Russian…..
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/22/world/europe/22russia.html?_r=0
My medical opinion is that someone should stimulate that clitoris.
My personal opinion is that a Brazilian is in order.
Some more “artistic” photos of the babysitter, Observer?
Sometimes the baby-sitter accidentally falls asleep on our couch….
http://beautifulwives.tumblr.com/image/40833101410
…and she doesn’t start her homework until after the kids are asleep….
http://24.media.tumblr.com/93a0df5af0172102b4f80d532103e260/tumblr_mfad4m1mLs1rljewwo1_500.jpg
That’s some hard hitting journalism.
I wonder how the security guard felt about Gayne’s “unusually large carp.”
Where is everyone?
Did you all turn MLK day into a long weekend?
Didn’t you hear the president???
MLK day is now a day of service…..
I plan to find a Asian hooker and have her service me all day long….
Thank you Dr. King!!!
Has anyone seen Pepper and Tuco…??
http://rebhuhnjagd.tumblr.com/image/40835913876
Jesus Christ!!!
I feel the need to reiterate that sticking foreign objects up your penis is not medically advisable.
On another note, that sort of connection must involve a high degree of trust, let alone friendship.
http://imgur.com/r/WTF/65Bn4
I have a pill for that
http://imgur.com/r/WTF/0UY26
Rokan……
….are you headed back to your farm for the long weekend…??
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3oj8bGHFz1r9x1k6o1_400.gif
Observer,
Do the cars get backed up at the drive thru window when you are fucking around all day?
Rokan…..
…I can hold a half-spuckie in one hand and click with the other……
….and nobody “really” knows what the accounting department is doing all day anyway….
Half-spuckie?
Is that Southie talk?
Southie??
I’m not from North Carolina…….Ohmwrecker is….
http://www.universalhub.com/glossary/spuckie.html
http://www.citydictionary.com/MA/Boston/Spuckie/4907/
Boston really used to be a great place to live…..
….I wonder what happened to it…..??
http://www.bostonzest.com/2011/03/craving-a-spuckie-from-cuttys.html
Wow….even the commie hpisters are writing about this stuff…
We’re beginning today with Sandwich #10, The Spuckie. Great name, with a controversial spelling. A “spucky” (as it’s spelled in Boston) is basically Boston’s take on the sub. The name spucky is thought to come from the Italian word spuccadella, a specific kind of Italian roll that can be used for the sandwich.
http://www.namelymarly.com/2011/02/america’s-top-10-new-sandwiches…veganized/
http://24.media.tumblr.com/cd5c51ad3c39167455c77c0e51a5b4a5/tumblr_mgt9trFOZt1rpg8kco1_1280.jpg
That strap looks like it is chafing his nipple.
Joe mon, we hare bot in but we can’t get out!
Dios mio, what putas!
My donkey has ha better mustachie then that wetback.
verdad story.
Eye tink el senor Gayner sat hon the door handle…he wanted to put eat up his culo.Jew hare a very sick man my friend.
Jew know what would be very funny senor?
Eef David knocked hon the door hand let jew hout….jes?
Da video was very funny senor Gaynor…were you tops hor bottom?
wat
I got my Mac back today with a fresh hard drive. Now all I need to do is get my stuff back on it. Easier said than done.
Off to get fucked up again!
I hate Monday’s with a passion!
Cheers, Gentlemen!
Hopefully, I drink enough to make my heart stop!
Start your Dead Pools!
I got my moon blood today. My long weekend is screwed.
Senor Gildorg, Tuco can take care off jour leetle problem. Hi can throw jew off a high bridge hor shoot jew een the head
Senorita minibush, Tuco has put hees pener in mierda, ha leetle blood can’t be hall that bad. Jes?
really? You’ve stuck your dick in shit before? Why would you do such a thing?
I’m guessing anything warm makes Tuco happy.
Senorita minibush, how brown ees jour tamale?
You know, I’ve never been a big fan of tamales. Call me odd.
ODD
Mini,
Thanks for sharing your personal plight with us. Pepper always talks about how he wishes he could have a period, or nurse a baby.
He’s sensitive that way.
Pepper is a baby and bleeds from his nose I suspect by the way he likes to stir the pot quite frequently.
I hear Pepper hangs out here?
Dick bumper……Pepper does….but he doesn’t hang far …..(confirm with Rokan)….
I like puppets.
I like mini gash, but i fear she is also a puppet.
I wonder if she too, has a taint weed.
I have been known to hang out here and “over there”
Pepper! I want to hang with you. Rokan sings your praises.
I have something to contribute to the group.
http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhf0IjFpsKGS49L1XS
This is a different flavor. See what I did there?
http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh41nXVcZ57y1G1732
Pepper, you look really good.
can you guys keep it down?
I’m listening to MLK speech
What’s he saying…??
Miss me yet?
<>
I fear I will always be accused of having strings…
Mini,
I know you are real. I’ve seen a picture of your pussy.
Dick Crotchbumper?
. . . Sounds made up.
Mini…..???
….strings or pads…??
Observer,
Who in your family finds Tom Brady most attractive, you or Mrs. O?
I find winning my football squares attractive.
Dick Crotchbumper? Fucking genius! Who did that? Rokan?
Not me. I was at the movies.
Nutt,
That’s insulting. I’m an artist, God dammit!
Question for you: I saw two trains today and neither of them a caboose.
I’d like to know what you have to say about that.
Signed,
Chagrined in Chicago
Forgive me for insulting you. Yes, you are an artist.
I am sorry to inform you but the railroad stopped using cabooses years ago.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cabin_car
That’s bullshit.
I owe, I owe…
So off to work I go…
Goddamn it…
This is Obamanation Season Two…
Why can’t I get all the shit for free?
I am guessing it is because I have the wrong skin tone…
Shit…
Gildorg,
Does this look swollen to you?
awesome fucking weekend.
trained with an actual UFC fighter, look up myles jury.
drank a shitload of whiskey while watching some fights
snowboarding yesterday.
about the only thing i didnt get this weekend was a blowjob. might have to call the 21 year old ex. truth be told i wouldnt mind retapping that. anyway, i digress. pussy = problems. id rather pay the ho to leave at this point.
What Happened?
Great question Mr. Nutt….
WTF…!!!????
How much does a “blog-host” cost….???
I think we’ve been guillotined………but the first pass only chopped off the tip….
New up
where did all the comments go?
He removed the posts because… New up